CONFUSED... still

im confused...

 

but before i elaborate on this matter, let me tell you that i just took Zinex: Antihistamine, so, in 30min i will feel soooo drowsy that i may not be able to make any sense here. my rhinitis is still acting up. i thought my medication for 2weeks was enough. i should've known better. this can last up to a month.

 

i am now sleepy. i can feel the medicine's effect. but as i promised, i will be telling you why i am confused.

 

again, it is because of a certain person who makes my life soooo complicated. i dont have to say his name. for you people who are monitoring this blog will know who i'm talking about. =D

 

but- wait... i said sorry to dude 2days ago and until now, he hasnt said he has forgiven me yet, but he's said "hi" already. weird. hehehe. prenster! kainis ka. madaya ka talaga. mutant nga ako, pero mas mutant ka na ngayon. harharhar =p

 

going back to the confusion part... i asked this person if he would meet with me when i go "there" and he gave me his assurance : "syempre naman oo!" life is soooo complicated with this person. but he doesnt reply to my texts, but texts me with "stuff" about uh- relationships, friendship, and life. one message i liked was about the logic behind "tsinelas" and "paa", that's the slippers and feet for you who dont understand Filipino. I am tsinelas, he is paa... always together and tsinelas protects paa. but paa will be very sad if tsinelas will be gone... hehehe. what do you make of this? i know this can mean friendship, but- hmmm... i'd rather think otherwise =D

 

it's like this, for almost 1yr, we didnt have any communication. he gave up his cellphone, so no text, no calls for us after we broke up... come Feb when i received an anonymous text asking if i can be a textmate. later on, he revealed that "he" is the one texting me, i called to make sure, sya nga...  grabe. i later learned from my friend who introduced us, that he kinda got my # back through borrowing her phone and well...pretending to play with the games and checking out the features... but actually, already searching for my name and my #. aha!!! buking!!! his friendster profile doesnt say "single" or "in a relationship"... but it says "it's complicated" like mine. that means we're both CONFUSED. hahaha!!! well, he admitted earlier that he still loves me... it's  just that... never mind... it's confusing me really.

 

why am i ranting about this, you would ask? well, i have nothing more productive to do. i am confused and i am now sleepy. my mind isnt working as it should be. i'll close my eyes for a while... i'll complete sequence later... hehehe... i'll be sleeping

quarantined: part 2

this is the continuation of the ranting i was doing yesterday. i am not really that affected... yeah right. ok, i am affected. greatly affected if you must. i am just consoled coz of someone who is always there through thick and thin, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. harharhar!

 

dude. yeah... my prenster. ka- SS and HH. wala lang. kakatawa sya. funny and sweet. hehehe. he's doing his thesis- daw. hahaha! about what exactly? the ways of the F*B*? or the theory of the SS and HH and how it began? or maybe even the differences and similarities of the incubus and the succubus. hihihi! pero like i told him, "kung saan ka masaya, suportahan tika." heeheehee ^_^

 

baby starfish. GRRRR!!! that 's all i can say. i'm not decided whether to sing Until I Get Over You or If I Never Get to Heaven whenever i hear his name. i know it's pathetic. even lame. and i know that it is even a stupid idea, me thinking of him. harharhar! my head is aching. my quarantine days are not over yet. i guess they have to add a few more days to that. maybe around 4 more days... ehehehe =D

 

i am not blogging. i am ranting. i was swapping emails with my ex. si pangeet. yes, him. the guy who completely ruined my life. we were discussing some "stuff" and by golly {hihihi} ang weird pa rin nya. he even looks weirder these days. i rather liked him before. i mean the way he looked. simple lang. ngayon... ewwww... hahaha! parang manyak-in-training, hihihi. i dont like that. eeewwwww...

 

hmmm... i am planning to add new characters to the book i am writing. of course it is about Black Cyd, fierce conqueror of the universe. born from the alien race, with powers no human can ever have. hahaha!!! i am over-describing. Cyd isnt an alien,  nor is he a conqueror of the universe. i am actually adding a character based on Dude, my prenster. one of the bad guys yung character para mirror image ni Dude. hehehe. bagay lang, kasi madaya. harharhar. Dude, peace!!! ^_^

 

this is quarantine part 2. i am wearing a hoodie already, but i still have a blanket over my shoulders. i also am wearing jeans and socks and shoes... but i still feel cold. why do i have to suffer like this?!?!?! my throat hurts, my head aches, my muscles are sore, and im sleepy.

 

as a Slytherin & la esposa el Draco Malfoy, im required to at least visit the Malfoy mansion once a month. harharhar! so im planning to go back sometime next month. i couldnt make it this month coz of this allergy that keeps coming back as much as i would like it to stop and never happen again. this calls for a lot of question marks and exclamation points... like this: ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?  see my point? heeheehee. Papa Lucius would be enraged to learn that the people here at Durmstrang are not taking care of me... Hogwarts couldnt be more better. wahahaha!!!

 

i am soooooooo sleepy... verrrrrry sleepy. and im still cold. i wish i can go home now. just 3hrs more and im home. yeeeeeheeeey!!! well, time check! it's just 1hr and 30min to go... and i'll be home!!! yeeeeeyyy!!! harharhar! i am also hungry by the way. i wish my bro would arrive today and bring food from home, so i'll be able to eat to my heart's content.

 

oh, yeah. i'm in the wedding entourage for my cuz- wedding- of course... Charles Conrad and Jane will wed onJune 8, 2006. supposedly it would've been on June 9, our Lolo Mon's and Uncle Daz birthday. but since it falls on a Friday, and Chinese doesnt practice getting married on that day, they moved it a day before. heeheehee. i cant wait  to wear my gown,  walk down the aisle, and sit at the presidential table at the reception. harharhar! by the way, i'm a secondary sponsor. sponsor for the cord to be exact. ehehehe... i just wish si - - - - partner ko, pero... no... hehehe... i'll have to stop this ranting and raving now... it's 5:10PM CST na, so out na ko!!! yeeheyyy!!!

quarantined...again

i've been quarantined for 1 week and 2 days... make it almost 2 weeks really.
this allergy is makin my life miserable, like someone somewhere "there" even
if he doesnt intend it, or does he? harharhar! talk about bittersweet memories.
tampo ako kay Dude. kainis sya... hehehe, pero gising na yun. ginising ko.
hehehe... this is what happens if payday is just 1 week away. funds are depleting.
as in!!! pero wait, feeling ko senti ako today, kaya eto muna song from Javier:

What does your love mean to me
its something i can't answer easily
just like the air that i breathe
you fill me up inside, you give me all that i need
like a bird flying high on a summers day
you're the wind that carries me away
to a place where you and i will always stay forever

chorus:
if i never get to heaven then at least i will have known
i had an angel here on earth that I could call my very own
and if this world should end tomorrow,  girl this much i know is true
i found my piece of heaven the day that i found you

verse 2:
longer than poets will rhyme 
girl my love will burn for you until the end of time
if i should die before tomorrow comes
i wont regret a single day, because i had your love
must be somethin in the way you say my name
it takes away my worries and my pain
girl i know we'll  make it through the rain together

chorus:
if i never get to heaven then at least i will have known
i had an angel here on earth that i could call my very own
and if this world should end tomorrow girl this much i know is true
i found my piece of heaven the day that i found you

bridge:
like a river flows and a flower grows, my love for you will never fade
like the sun will rise in the morning sky
you know that i am here to stay forever

(instrumental interlude)

chorus:
if i never get to heaven then at least i will have known 
i had an angel here on earth that i could call my very own
and if the world should end tomorrow
girl this much i know is true
i have found my piece of heaven the day that i found you

like a river flows and a flower grows, my love for you will never fade
like the sun will rise in the morning sky you know i am here to stay

that was If I Never Get to Heaven. ang sweet noh? heeheehee...
that's my song for ----> secret!!! i'm not telling. hehe. kahiya.
i mean hiya ako eh. harharhar! compare nyo nalang sa previous song 
i posted from Christina Millan na Until I Get Over You,
di ba mas maganda pakinggan yung song that's declaring undying
love for someone... yung tipong di mo masasabi na sila talaga nung guy/girl.
thrilling effect baga. di gaya nung previous song na alam mo na break na sila
pero sige parin sya. hahaha! i know, i know, ganyan ako. i'm that stupid.
whatever happens, if i said i love you, i will love you for the rest of my life,
unless you did me wrong kung kaya nag break tayo.
pero kung hindi naman, well... expect a thousand years of love from me.
Hoy! matagal na yung thousand years ha. sino ba ngayon ang tumatagal ng ganon?
mas mabuti nga yun kesa sa sasabihin na "i love you forever" pero next week iba na kasama.
at kaka-break nyo lang ha. grabeeeeeeee!!! i know, me pinatatamaan ako dito.
i know you asked me if i had dated someone right after we broke up.
i know you asked my friend kung ganon daw ba kabilis mag palit ng guy... excuse me!!!
gawain mo, wag mo ibalik sakin pare. hahahaha!!! pero maghintay ka lang... i'll be back!!! =p

i'm claiming back what is mine...

to be continued...

Rujiko-san: Ode to Baby Starfish

Woke up today thinking of you
Another night and I made my way through
So many dreams still left in my mind
But they could never come true
I press rewind
I remember when I close my eyes and I’m with you again
But in the end I can still feel the pain
Every time I hear your name

The sun won’t shine since you went away
Seems like the rain’s falling every day
There’s just one heart, where there once was two
That’s the way it’s gotta be, until I get over you…

Walked through the park, in the evening air
I heard a voice and I thought you were there
I run away but I just can’t escape
Memories of you everywhere
They say the time will dry the tears
But true love burns for a thousand years
Give my tomorrows for one yesterday
Just to know that I could have you here

When will this river of tears stop fallin’
Where can I run so I won’t feel alone
Can’t walk away when the pain keeps callin’
I’ve just gotta take it from here on my own
But it’s so hard to let go .....
thats the way its gotta be until i get over you

*** damn!!! Old Mr Time is playing a mean trick on me... tsk, tsk, tsk...

F*B*

talk about HH and SS.... man, after a year or so of being out of the F*B* civilization, i am back. hahaha!!! thanks to Mr Sshh... hahaha!!!

me: transfixed no more

me: transfixed no more. harharhar!!! had a "sweet"  interesting session with the incubus-in-training Mr Sshh.Ü hahaha! i call it sweet and interesting coz of the stuff i am learning. heeheehee. i am not saying that i dont know anything about the stuff we discussed about. its just different when spoken from the mouth of the pro. hehe. i didnt know you could be sweet and uh- aggressive at the same time. whatever. i dont know why i am saying this. its not me. no. really.

 

about Draco. i guess my dilemma is resolved. he wont be coming over this Tuesday {tomorrow}. yehey!!! its like- whoa, that was close. ^_^ but, he'll surely be coming over on my birthday. awwww... now its like- uh-oh, prepare yourself for the battle of the year.Ü but i miss him. really. ={

 

i went online and checked on my friendster account recently and wrote testimonials to some friends i have on my list. the latest "testi" i made was for a friend waaaaay back highschool days. Sherwin. he's in Canda now. i dont know what happened with the friendship, but before he left, we suddenly stopped talking to each other. i have a feeling it was because of a certain person why we stopped being "friends."

 

---- newsflash!!! ----

 

oh, how i miss this newsflash thingy. hahaha!!! i just realized something. hahaha. how can i be so stupid? hahaha!!! Ace, dude, you shed some light on this stuff. thanks prenster.Ü hahaha!!! i still cant help it, but im just amused of how stupid i can get sometimes. Ei, pangeet, i know we've discussed this too many times but i havent really connected it with uh- that thing- {F*B*} hahahah!!! Dude, grabe, your lessons are really worth it. hahaha!!! mind if we have another session later?Ü

 

---- back to normal programming ----

 

Y-Man is looking over my shoulder and reading what im writing. heeheehee. so, i'll give him extra media time while posting this with his name. hehehe.

 

going back to the uh- past. yes, where was i? hmmm... Sherwin. Dude, i know who might be the reason why we fell apart as buddies, but, what i dont know is why you let it happen. i didnt see any reason for that. unless of course--- never mind. hahaha!!! i wont bother myself with thoughts of "that" person.

 

i am smiling again for no reason. maybe because of Louis' comment about--- hahahah!!! kinda nice to know some people see your worth and appreciate it. and its also nice to know that some people like you for who you are and what you have. Ace dude, thanks again. and Draco... why, oh why do i like you sooooo much? you know i love you.Ü ehehehehe. the one and only El Draconis. there can be only one- highlander. Duncan McCleod. lived for 400yrs... wait- why am i blabbering about it?

 

i'm thinking of enrolling in Mr Sshh school of SS and HH, coz he actually volunteered to be my personal instructor- uh- professor, if you may. feeling kasi nya pro na sya talaga. hehehe. pero for me he's the incubus-in-training. habulin kasi ng succubus eh. so, dapat mag train sya to become a full-fledged incubus para bagay sila ng succubus nya.Ü dapat dun nalang sya mag concentrate and not to teach the ways of the F*B*. hahahaha!!!

 

haaaay naku, i have to stop this na. im not making any sense na. wala lang. happy lang ako coz of a lot of things... specially kasi 3 days RD ko! yehey!!!

 

 

"Eka ai Fricai un Shur'tugal"

me: transfixed

this is not the time for me to write my blog, but here i am crossing the line. hehehehe. im not really in the mood to write anything, though. i mean, i will just write whatever comes to mind.
i have watched MI3 already. cool movie. but what im waiting for are X3 and Da Vinci Code. cant wait to see Angel. Warren Warrington. Psylocke's other half... i am Psylocke. hehehe. in another world, i am Rogue, and Gambit is my man.
updating my blog is soooooo hard these days. i dont have the time and the patience to think about what to write, so i am just writing out of nothing. harharhar.
if you noticed i posted a pic of Max, the sled dog from 8 Below. aint he cute? and Maya, too. but i like Max better. he's soooo cutie. he's been in numerous movies including another Disney movie starring Cuba Gooding. i forgot the title. im sure one of the dogs was Max, too. ^_^
oh, yeah... Draco is coming over this Tuesday. aaaaaaaaahhhh!!! this is soooooo totally- uh- unexpected. i dont know what to do. he planned to spend time with me. maybe he knew that i  have 3days off from work this week... hmmmm... who leaked out the info? better tell me or else... i am sooo freaked out now. sabog isip ko ngayon.
maiba muna. i received an email reply from pangeet. he's complaining that he is depressed as hell... its coz he didnt listen to the advice i gave him, rather, ALL the advices i gave him. i told him: "dont say i didnt warn you..."
going back to the true issue for the day. Draco!!! aaaaaahhhh!!! im still freaked out. im like an immobile being staring into space. kulang nalang mabutas yung monitor ng pc. hehehehe...

 

darn it, i have to talk to this guy, first. di na ko mapakali---